An "interesting" Elul for me

I spent a nice chunk of Elul helping schlep the Son-ster and the better part of his possessions from thither to yon while fighting a case of bronchitis so severe that it caused asthma attacks. The only reason why I went back to work so soon is that I’d already used three of my six annual sick days within three weeks. Being too tired and/or debilitated to get up at a decent hour, I’ve managed to miss every single weekday morning minyan, and, consequently, every shofar blowing, for the entire month of Elul. To boot, I’ve been so wiped out that I’ve skipped praying a lot of services at home, as well.

So there I was, having accidentally taken an express train, standing on an elevated subway platform waiting for a local and admiring the full moon when it suddenly hit me: Elul was half over, and I hadn’t recite Hashem ori v'yishi (Psalm 27, the penitential-season psalm), even once! Eek!

Adding insult to injury, I managed to pick up what I suspect was a mild case of food poisoning this past Saturday night. (Remind me never to eat egg salad at seudah shlishit again.) So, while everyone else was at synagogue enjoying the Selichot service, which I’ve always thought of as the musical introduction to the Yamin Noraim/High Holidays (since it’s during this service that one hears the Yamim Noraim melodies for the first time), I was stuck at home, um, shall we say, getting rid of everything I’d eaten all day in a most unpleasant manner. (Not the pleasantest way to lose weight, lemme tell ya. (: )

Oddly enough, this is the first time in my life that I’ve recovered from laryngitis without getting my singing voice back along with my speaking voice. I really dreaded the thought that I might have to go through all of Rosh Hashanah (Jewish New Year) unable to do more than croak along with the cantor. Remember the lyrics to that old song, “Jeremiah was a bullfrog . . .”? Well, that’s how I’ve sounded for the past few weeks.

Imagine my relief when I recovered just enough of my singing voice to be able to lead Birkat Hamazon (Grace after Meals), at my girlfriend’s request, on this, the happiest occasion I’ve enjoyed since our son’s graduation . . .